| "They're All Out of Liquor, Let's Find Another Party!" |
[23 Sep 2005|11:11am] |
"Now do you get it! It's them, not you...
So don't feel so funny
Live for risks, they don't...
There's no fight in them, no spit and fire
Nothing gets them angry
Oh come on, let's go shake the world
Be thrilled by the thought
That it's wild out there
Even if it's really not that great...
I want you to be so happy
You will bug them with your presence
They'll say you're wrong, you have no style
I want you to be lean and hungry
Slum geniuses kicking limos
Walking by yourself down Razor Street
I want you to know people who laugh too loud
And have to get drunk to find the right words
And can't sleep 'til the colors are just right
I want you to talk back, be out of line, be peculiar
If you don't know your plans, so what?
You should show up at their parties
Frankly state their music's lousy
Their art is stupid, don't be cool
Do mind bottled dressing
Object to instant coffee
And go to movies all alone
Look someone in the eyes and say you'll satisfy them,
Though you both know the way love is, that's a lie
I want to see your fists in their searchlights
Hear danger from their radio
Toke every chance you can to get revenge
No pain killers, take it straight with a twist of anxiety
"Patience" means "never"
Don't shake hands
Don't smile a lot
Not much "please" and "thank you"
Believe in "no"
Insist on "why"
Want false hopes, expect magic
Put your life on the line for something
Bet on dreams, again and again
Make a country that's fat and smart
That doesn't love to screw its own
And gives, instead of sucks the world dry."
- The Waitresses (My Heroines)
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| How I Won't Be Spending This Summer Vacation |
[23 Jul 2005|01:09pm] |
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Whitney Matheson laid out a delicious spread in one of her most recent articles for USA Today entitled "How I Won't Be Spending My Summer Vacation". I appreciated the fact that I wasn't the only person who couldn't say "boojy" with a straight face. She asked readers to comment on what we'd be avoiding this summer, and I jumped on that faster than the $2.99 Victoria's Secret v-string sale. So without furher adiue:
What I won't be doing this summer...
1. Jumping on the "Poor Brad Pitt!" bandwagon: Viral meningitis, my arse. Homeboy has straight up SARS from globe-trotting with Angelina and her mohawk baby.
2. Congratulating Courtney Love on her rehab efforts: I give her another sixteen hours before she gets loaded, drops trou, verbally assaults an airline worker, loses custody of her kid, and incoherently addresses the press. Not necessarily in that order.
3. Acting surprised when Britney Spears breaks up with what's-his-name: Never mind the fact he already has two kids and baby mama drama. Forget the fact he's regularly photographed in various boob bars while Britney's back home working on Lamaze. When it comes time to change the diapers and calm a teething child, Britney's going to realize Kevin's too busy playing X-Box and buying do-rags than to take on more parenting responsibilities.
4. Campaigning to "Feed Mary-Kate": Who can compete with all those pro-ana/mia LiveJournal communities who look to her for "thinspiration"? Not I!
5. Following any scary fashion trends: Floor scraping linen skirts. Oversized beaded necklaces. Cowboy boots. More reasons to participate in ritual suicide.
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| Feliz Cumpleaños... |
[06 Oct 2004|12:04pm] |
Happy B-Day, Pooshee. Wishing you all the best on the big 2-2 and all the kitty tents in the world to hide in.
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| And If I Close My Eyes Really, Really Tight...I'll Make Frances Go Away |
[04 Sep 2004|01:55pm] |
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Surely this must be the most ridiculous storm system in the history of the world. They advised us to evacuate Thursday. Okay, so everyone hurry up and stock up on water and batteries and get the hell out of dodge aready. And now we sit, glazed eyes fixed to the television watching the same stupid swirling ball of orange and yellow heading towards the Florida penninsula that was there since...well, since FUCKING THURSDAY!!! Noooo, I don't have cabin fever or anything.
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| It All Goes Back to the Bacon at Lent |
[13 Jul 2004|09:06am] |
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"Say It Ain't So" - Weezer |
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I guess, inevitably, it all started with eating the bacon at Lent. That's my precursor to every source of mire and point of contention in my life since around the time of Easter. Most recent fake flake/Aries rising/effects of bacon consumption:
1. The bill for Mike's gift came out to almost $70 bucks. This was a little curious to me, as it didn't seem like I bought that much. In my haste to scamper out to Coral Springs, I neglect to read the handwritten receipt and question this gross abuse to my checking account.
2. Between Amiee, Jared, and myself, the bill came to $72 at Ninja Sushi. Interesting. My dinner was $14 or something, but man alive! Somehow when it came time to pay, Amiee made her money back, I was out $30 and Jared, who ate the least out of any of us paid more then he should have. It was very bizarre. Really frickin' bizarre.
3. I return home, bladder full and appetite sated. As I has just blown over $100 on food and gifts, there was no way I could go to Fat Cat's with the smart people who didn't eat at Ninja Sushi and saved their money for the drinking later. I notice a candle that didn't make it into Mike's gift and further inspect it. I thought the price tag said $12.95 at the store. Yeah, no. The candle was $21.95, thus jacking up my bill at Jezebel. It's all coming together now.
4. I do the only logical thing I can think of at midnight three beers later considering Jezebel's doesn't do returns, exchanges, or the like. I put that shit on Ebay.
Votivo Aromatic Candle - Crisp Clean White
It's the start of a new day and I'm already swamped, but I had to impart these most serious reprecussions from the bacon-eating debachle at Lent. In other news, I'm taking any and all submissions for my website about anything and everything and nothing at all. Skrink's MySpace profile has been updated with new pictures.
PS: I hope you had a fabulous birthday, Mike!
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[05 Jun 2004|03:46pm] |
Battle my monkey, bitch.
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[25 May 2004|09:09pm] |
| PARENTAL | | ADVISORY | LUCA CONTAINS
EXPLICIT LYRICS |
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| There's No Indication of What We Were Meant To Be |
[11 May 2004|09:50am] |
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music |
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Metric - "Hustle Rose" |
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A very Bohemian evening at Casa de Luca, of edamame and Beringer and kittens skating the hardwood floors. Amiee and I sat outside and smoked our cloves, talking about the little things, the big things, mothers in general, men in general, kittens in particular, and the creation of lists that start off with, "You know you have to do laundry when..."
So far we've got:
1. ...when coworkers ask if the shirt you're wearing is new.
2. ...people start off conversations with, "Hey, I remember that skirt!" as if they were recollecting last Christmas.
3. ...you reaffirm your beliefs in not wearing underware, more out of practicality for not currently owning a clean pair.
4. ...you justify using the same bath towel for a week by thinking that you were clean after you got out of the shower and used it anyways.
5. ...you do laundry and people think you went shopping over the weekend.
6. ...you forgo shoes that require socks to avoid the tedious hunt for clean ones.
7. ...febreeze is synonomous with "washer" and "air freshner"
8. ...you justify Febreezing by concluding it's cheaper than going to the laundromat and not as daunting as going home with your laundry.
9. ...on that note, you'd rather wear the same bra for 3 weeks and a dirty dress every other week than deal with the emotional baggage that comes with dragging your laundry to your families' house.
10. ...and still on that note, you try and explain this to people and you just come off as "nasty".
11. ...you wonder if the steam option on the iron actually constitutes cleaning because there's water involved.
Oh, we have more things to impart:
Word of the Day: Philophal (phil-law-ful) - to philosophize
i.e.
Luca: "Jared and Matt could easily concoct theories on the Cable Guy's incessant need for male bonding being latent homosexuality and weak male figures in his early childhood."
Amiee: "Did they ever end up philophaling?"
But wait! There's more!
Everyone, send your birthday wishes over Jared's way. He's an old Go-At today, complete with billy goat beard. I'd jump out of scone if I could.
Mike, I love you to death, just been muy busy with my million mile an hour life. Give me a call and such. We'll do martinis. It will be fabulous.
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